Sorry for the delay on this one folks - it’s Spring Break and I have been a day off all week! Today’s piece is pretty special to me as it gets to the heart of so much I feel we miss in changing how we approach mental health!
Let’s start by imagining a moment, seemingly inconsequential, where a single interaction changes the course of your life. It could be as simple as a conversation on a bus, a compliment from a stranger, or an encouraging nod from a mentor at a critical juncture. These fleeting encounters, often overlooked in the grand scheme of our lives, hold the power to ignite inspiration, alter perceptions, and foster unexpected paths.
For instance, a struggling writer on the verge of giving up their dream might receive unexpected praise from a stranger who stumbled upon their blog. This small gesture of appreciation could reignite their passion, leading them to create a piece that resonates with thousands. Or, a young person, unsure of their career path, could be inspired by a casual chat with a mentor who sees potential in them that they never saw in themself. This brief exchange might be the catalyst for them to pursue a fulfilling career he had never considered.
For me, it was a conversation in a dank dark basement of a school. I had had another rough encounter with a student who was yelling how much they hated me, the school, and their life. This was my second year as a teacher, and it was becoming obvious to me that this was not my long term career path. I was leading a very tough class, with kids who needed a whole lot more help than I could give them, and daily I would go home frustrated at a system that was failing them and their families.
I sought out my principal in the basement, where he was at the time, and shared with him my frustrations. On the surface, the talk I had with my principal was simple: “I just don’t know what to do anymore. Her mom is in jail again, her dad’s using, and she’s coming to school and raging on me and others because of all this pain. I am failing her. We are all failing her.”
My principal, a wise man, sensing the urgency of this moment, simply said, “You have to change the system.” Such a simple thing to say that I have said countless times since, and yet in this moment, it was what I needed to hear. It was his challenge to me to do something big. Months later, after submitting a few applications to graduate schools, my principal, who was my boss but became my mentor, was the first one to hug me congratulating me on getting accepted to graduate school.
In these moments, the power of human connection shines brightly, demonstrating that our interactions, no matter how brief, carry the potential to transform lives. The beauty of these encounters lies in their simplicity and the reminder that we are all connected in deeply meaningful ways, often beyond our immediate understanding. It was a 5 minute conversation that changed the direction of my life.
This past week, two interesting articles came out, both from New York City that I think build on this.
The first was a story in the New York Times that described a pilot program implemented in Prospect Park, Brooklyn. Basically, teams were dispatched to engage parkgoers in conversations about their mental health and well-being. Community workers walked through the park, initiating discussions with individuals irrespective of visible signs of distress. I loved this, of course, and the name they gave it, Open Air Connections, is really solid. The city is working to destigmatize mental health care and provide support through community outreach efforts. These outreach teams were all trained to assess individuals' concerns and make referrals to appropriate agencies for assistance, when needed. What I love the most is how this program shows a major shift towards proactive mental health interventions, emphasizing the importance of bringing support directly to people in need, rather than relying solely on clinical settings.
Building off of this, keeping a major focus on prevention, there was a second article, an op-ed in the New York Times by my friend, and the wonderful health commissioner of New York City, Dr. Ashwin Vasan. Here Ashwin lays out how we should be paying a lot more attention to the national health emergency of declining life expectancy in the United States. He advocates for a coordinated industrial policy for health to combat chronic diseases, overdoses, and other factors contributing to decreased life spans. But that’s not it. What I particularly thought was spot on was his emphasis on the importance of prioritizing prevention over clinical care, increasing funding for public health departments, and redirecting resources toward preventive health care and social services critical to long-term health. These are the exact type of things you see happening in small encounter interventions like the Open Air Connections program.
In a world where a single encounter can change the course of a life, the power of human connection will always shine the brightest. It's in these fleeting moments, often overlooked, that we find the potential to transform not only ourselves but also the world around us. Whether it's a conversation with a stranger in a park or a mentor's wise words in a smoky basement, these interactions have the power to ignite inspiration, alter perceptions, and foster unexpected paths.
Today, consider how these small interactions can be life changing. No pressure, but approach your interactions with a keen eye on how it might help someone else. You never know who is listening and what impact if may have on them.
Happy Spring Break!
All of this is in support of your post...bravo bravo
My go to, at least in my mind is, "Connection is at the heart of our humanity." When we connect for a moment or a lifetime our/their humanity grows. In ways both large and small.
Perhaps not as profound as your reference of a struggling writer or career questions I try to engage in small random acts of connection. At a checkout I ask the cashier how ya doing? All good? There is a moment they look up and smile. I'm not there for a transaction but to connect in a small way. Will that be profound for them? Hell no but, they know they are seen and heard.
Recently having dinner with a buddy and his family a table away was a child. A little one which for the life of me guessing ages of urchins is hard. Young enough to be in a booster seat. She looked at me. I looked at her. We smiled. She giggled hid her face. And it was on. The whole meal we connected, laughed, smiled, shy'd, and more. Across a room. I went to the table and thanked the parents for the amazing gift of engagement that that kid had in abundance. They are raising a warrior. Girl Loki
In the end the kid will never remember this or me. The parents may boast for a day or two about how cute the daughter is. Word up. Me well that's an engagement connection that will be with me for a long time. It tramped down my doubts about me as a human of value. It gave me joy which can be far and few between. So the unexpected stranger we can be for others is a two way street. It can feed us.
I'm a volunteer crisis counselor and all my interactions are brief exchanges where I put my heart into every word I read or hear. I will never know if what I've done is profound (in some cases I know they were). When done chatting I try to feel I did good. Helped another connected. I may never know if I did. We may never know if we did but we must embrace measured outcomes are not the true value of connection. Connection is.
So true -- it especially powerful when someone with authority believes in us and expresses it outlound.