If I may Dr. Miller respond to this brilliant and important post. First my disclaimers (i.e. grain of salt), I'm not a parent like ever, I'm not a mental health professional, and I've only recently become active in mental health with teens not many years here.
I am a crisis counselor and I am a counselor on an app for jr. high and high school kids. Volunteer again.
Without a doubt from my small lens and limited experience you are absolutely correct about children and mental health. I see so many children in crisis coming on to share, talk, looking for help, and to find someone who will listen.
"Follow the emotions How are they expressing themselves? "
Again, from my small lens and limited experience I have been and continue to be so very impressed with how articulate and insightful kids can be will be when we listen, allow them to share in a safe place, at their pace, and validate their feelings emotions pain. I've come to see in their texting words something I can only describe as I listen and share 'They take their shoulder blades out of their ears and relax'. Suddenly words flow like an artesian aquifer. I get to smile. And I'm no parent so I can only imagine how a parent must feel to make that connection. All jelly here.
Of course: small lens, small sample, and really the ones I chat with come into to say, as you note, they are struggling. Predisposed to wanting to share.
In the end I have a sense that I helped just in listening. I helped in my compassion. I helped in my offering resources. Once they log off, better for a moment I pray, I pray they know sharing is a path to finding a way forward not alone. A path to being who they are worthy to be.
I've received many responses to my conversations with those struggling. I've gotten a few you saved my life. The most recent one that meant the most to me and is the perfect cap to my rambling here is this
"I felt seen"
Indeed the children need to feel seen though listening and sharing. You got this mom and dad. Like totally just observe and act.
Your column and Mark's comments help me understand better why I so enjoy being in classrooms lately. I can tell so many students are struggling but so many respond so well when you take the time to really talk to them and listen. (And of course, by teaching them to create journalism about mental health, they're learning so much about the topic, teaching others (who are more likely to believe them) and gaining self confidence/agency along the way.
I'm quoting your column, Ben, in something I'm writing!
If I may Dr. Miller respond to this brilliant and important post. First my disclaimers (i.e. grain of salt), I'm not a parent like ever, I'm not a mental health professional, and I've only recently become active in mental health with teens not many years here.
I am a crisis counselor and I am a counselor on an app for jr. high and high school kids. Volunteer again.
Without a doubt from my small lens and limited experience you are absolutely correct about children and mental health. I see so many children in crisis coming on to share, talk, looking for help, and to find someone who will listen.
"Follow the emotions How are they expressing themselves? "
Again, from my small lens and limited experience I have been and continue to be so very impressed with how articulate and insightful kids can be will be when we listen, allow them to share in a safe place, at their pace, and validate their feelings emotions pain. I've come to see in their texting words something I can only describe as I listen and share 'They take their shoulder blades out of their ears and relax'. Suddenly words flow like an artesian aquifer. I get to smile. And I'm no parent so I can only imagine how a parent must feel to make that connection. All jelly here.
Of course: small lens, small sample, and really the ones I chat with come into to say, as you note, they are struggling. Predisposed to wanting to share.
In the end I have a sense that I helped just in listening. I helped in my compassion. I helped in my offering resources. Once they log off, better for a moment I pray, I pray they know sharing is a path to finding a way forward not alone. A path to being who they are worthy to be.
I've received many responses to my conversations with those struggling. I've gotten a few you saved my life. The most recent one that meant the most to me and is the perfect cap to my rambling here is this
"I felt seen"
Indeed the children need to feel seen though listening and sharing. You got this mom and dad. Like totally just observe and act.
Thank you, Mark. You are a gem and making a true difference.
Your column and Mark's comments help me understand better why I so enjoy being in classrooms lately. I can tell so many students are struggling but so many respond so well when you take the time to really talk to them and listen. (And of course, by teaching them to create journalism about mental health, they're learning so much about the topic, teaching others (who are more likely to believe them) and gaining self confidence/agency along the way.
I'm quoting your column, Ben, in something I'm writing!